When Tragedy Strikes
Tragedy is something that we cannot avoid in life. It happens sometimes more to one person than the other but it will still affect everyone in some kind of way. The way to help a family under a severe amount of stress is learning how to cope with those tragedies. But what is coping to you? Coping is not merely surviving. Coping is not merely going through the motions of your life and getting things done. It is more than just getting by. Coping is making those adjustments that allow you to do more than just survive but to help you function and rebuild yourself to be happy again.
Now the definition of tragedy is different for everyone. Dictionary.com states that "tragedy is a lamentable, dreadful, or fatal event or affair; calamity; disaster." So for one family tragedy could be a death in the family or a divorce between parents. For others, tragedy could be the loss or destruction of a home. I personally know a single woman whom lives alone with her dog. Her dog had to be put down because it was very sick. This woman was absolutely devastated. She was depressed for months and didn't know how to cope with that loss. She had to completely immerse herself in work in order to keep herself from staying at home drinking all day. That is a tragedy that I personally do not understand. I have never had a pet. I cannot fully understand and empathize with someone because i don't know what it is like to loose a pet. I couldn't even imagine what it would be like. But unlike her, I have experienced a divorce in my family. She could not even imagine what it would be like to go through the pain that I went through. So you can see how tragedy is different for everyone.
So how do we cope with these struggles we inevitably go through? The first and most important step is to talk about it. Talking through your struggles and hardships helps someone feel (1) heard, and (2) understood. This makes them feel less alone in their struggles. It is also crucial to find a balance in your life. If you are going through something depressing you need to find things that make you happy; things that make life worth the struggle. When someone can find happiness in other things, it makes the struggles more bearable. Anther crucial step is to know that you are justified in being upset. Know that it is normal to feel upset, angry, frustrated, hurt, etc. And don't let anyone make you feel like you aren't justified in feeling that way. Embracing how you actually feel will help you get past those struggles in the future. Also, make sure to take care of yourself emotionally and physically. If you are having a day when you really need to just order take-out and eat it while watching Netflix in bed then DO IT. But also make sure to clean your house, shower and get ready for the day, stay productive and exercise. Taking care of yourself makes depression a lot easier. And stay productive. Being productive and busy does not mean avoiding the feelings you have toward the tragedy. Being productive helps you feel your self-worth. And last of all, pace yourself. You don't have to be "better" overnight. That is not normal nor is it possible. It is okay to take the time you need to recover from what happened to you.
Whatever the case may be, if we accept what happens, allow ourselves to feel, and work through those emotions we can regain happiness and balance in our lives.
Now the definition of tragedy is different for everyone. Dictionary.com states that "tragedy is a lamentable, dreadful, or fatal event or affair; calamity; disaster." So for one family tragedy could be a death in the family or a divorce between parents. For others, tragedy could be the loss or destruction of a home. I personally know a single woman whom lives alone with her dog. Her dog had to be put down because it was very sick. This woman was absolutely devastated. She was depressed for months and didn't know how to cope with that loss. She had to completely immerse herself in work in order to keep herself from staying at home drinking all day. That is a tragedy that I personally do not understand. I have never had a pet. I cannot fully understand and empathize with someone because i don't know what it is like to loose a pet. I couldn't even imagine what it would be like. But unlike her, I have experienced a divorce in my family. She could not even imagine what it would be like to go through the pain that I went through. So you can see how tragedy is different for everyone.
So how do we cope with these struggles we inevitably go through? The first and most important step is to talk about it. Talking through your struggles and hardships helps someone feel (1) heard, and (2) understood. This makes them feel less alone in their struggles. It is also crucial to find a balance in your life. If you are going through something depressing you need to find things that make you happy; things that make life worth the struggle. When someone can find happiness in other things, it makes the struggles more bearable. Anther crucial step is to know that you are justified in being upset. Know that it is normal to feel upset, angry, frustrated, hurt, etc. And don't let anyone make you feel like you aren't justified in feeling that way. Embracing how you actually feel will help you get past those struggles in the future. Also, make sure to take care of yourself emotionally and physically. If you are having a day when you really need to just order take-out and eat it while watching Netflix in bed then DO IT. But also make sure to clean your house, shower and get ready for the day, stay productive and exercise. Taking care of yourself makes depression a lot easier. And stay productive. Being productive and busy does not mean avoiding the feelings you have toward the tragedy. Being productive helps you feel your self-worth. And last of all, pace yourself. You don't have to be "better" overnight. That is not normal nor is it possible. It is okay to take the time you need to recover from what happened to you.
Whatever the case may be, if we accept what happens, allow ourselves to feel, and work through those emotions we can regain happiness and balance in our lives.
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