The Way I See Divorce
Divorce has been a sensitive subject for many people. I am not writing my opinions about divorce to offend or hurt people. That is not my goal. My goal is to help those who struggle with the subject to understand that there are a lot of people out there that go through the same thing and understand how they feel.
When I was a kid, divorce seemed like a rare occurrence. At first I thought that I just wasn't aware of the world around me. I was merely a naive child. But when I looked up the statistics I found that in 2003 divorce rates were at 7.7%. Meaning that 7.7% of marriages were ending in divorce. Today, in 2018, between 40% and 50% of marriages are ending in divorce. It is no longer something that happens when abuse, adultery, abandonment, or alcoholism is involved. People now days are getting divorced because they simply don't get along with their spouse anymore, they aren't finding the relationship fun anymore, they aren't receiving the benefits that they thought marriage would bring them.
This is my opinion on divorce. If someone is getting divorced because the relationship isn't "fun" or "beneficial" for them or they simply "don't find themselves attracted to their spouse", they are selfish and they should ponder more on what marriage really is. Marriage is not going to be sunshine and roses all the time. It is hard work. If you want a relationship to work, you have to put forth the effort. You have to treasure it. Sometimes you have to decide to love the person you are with. And if you are looking for the "perfect spouse" you will look in vein your entire life. Don't get me wrong, marriage is a beautiful thing. I am happily married and I love my husband with all that I have. But that doesn't mean that we don't have arguments. That doesn't mean that we hang out at home 24/7 and stare into each other's eyes lovingly either. We work hard, we budget (which isn't fun but we have to do it), we communicate our needs to each other, and we put each other first in everything. That is what makes it work. That hard work and devotion is what helps us to have a happy marriage. And if we had not done these things it would have been easy to give up on our relationship and had a divorce a long time ago.
That may have seemed like an angry rant. But all I'm trying to say is that divorce is not as necessary as many people think it is. There are a few cases in which it is necessary. Especially when people suffer from abuse for example. But divorce is a cowardly way to run away from one's problems.
The family is so important. And when something is important we should treat it differently.
O divorco e um topico sensitivo para muitas pessoas. Eu nao estou escrevendo minha opinao sobre divorco para ofender ou causar dor para pessoas. Isso nao e minha meta. Minha meta e ajudar as pessoas que soffrem com esse topico a entender que ha muitas pessoas no mundo sofrer as mesmas coisas e que muitas pessos entendem como eles sentem.
When I was a kid, divorce seemed like a rare occurrence. At first I thought that I just wasn't aware of the world around me. I was merely a naive child. But when I looked up the statistics I found that in 2003 divorce rates were at 7.7%. Meaning that 7.7% of marriages were ending in divorce. Today, in 2018, between 40% and 50% of marriages are ending in divorce. It is no longer something that happens when abuse, adultery, abandonment, or alcoholism is involved. People now days are getting divorced because they simply don't get along with their spouse anymore, they aren't finding the relationship fun anymore, they aren't receiving the benefits that they thought marriage would bring them.
This is my opinion on divorce. If someone is getting divorced because the relationship isn't "fun" or "beneficial" for them or they simply "don't find themselves attracted to their spouse", they are selfish and they should ponder more on what marriage really is. Marriage is not going to be sunshine and roses all the time. It is hard work. If you want a relationship to work, you have to put forth the effort. You have to treasure it. Sometimes you have to decide to love the person you are with. And if you are looking for the "perfect spouse" you will look in vein your entire life. Don't get me wrong, marriage is a beautiful thing. I am happily married and I love my husband with all that I have. But that doesn't mean that we don't have arguments. That doesn't mean that we hang out at home 24/7 and stare into each other's eyes lovingly either. We work hard, we budget (which isn't fun but we have to do it), we communicate our needs to each other, and we put each other first in everything. That is what makes it work. That hard work and devotion is what helps us to have a happy marriage. And if we had not done these things it would have been easy to give up on our relationship and had a divorce a long time ago.
That may have seemed like an angry rant. But all I'm trying to say is that divorce is not as necessary as many people think it is. There are a few cases in which it is necessary. Especially when people suffer from abuse for example. But divorce is a cowardly way to run away from one's problems.
The family is so important. And when something is important we should treat it differently.
O divorco e um topico sensitivo para muitas pessoas. Eu nao estou escrevendo minha opinao sobre divorco para ofender ou causar dor para pessoas. Isso nao e minha meta. Minha meta e ajudar as pessoas que soffrem com esse topico a entender que ha muitas pessoas no mundo sofrer as mesmas coisas e que muitas pessos entendem como eles sentem.
Quando era uma crianca, divorco era uma coisa rara. Talvez isso e porque eu nao sabia sobre as coisas do mundo no meu redor. Eu era uma crianca ingenuo. Mas quando eu estudei um pouco mais eu achei estatisticas que mostrem que em 2003 7.7 percento de casamentos terminaram em divorco. Agora em 2018 entre 40 percento e 50 percento casamentos terminam em divorco. Divorco nao mais e uma coisa que terminda por causa de abuso, adultario, alcooismo, ou abandono. As pessoas de hoje divorcem porque eles simplesmente nao gostam dos esposos deles, eles nao acham que o relacionamento e divirtido, eles nao estao recebendo os beneficios que eles acharam que o casamento iria lhes dar.
Essa e a minha opinao do divorco. Se alguem esta divorcando porque o relacionamento nao e "divirtido" ou "beneficial" ou ele simplesmente "nao se acham atraidos ao esposo," eles sao egoistas e devem ponderar mais sobre o que o casamento realmente e. Casamento nao vai ser sol e rosas constantamente. E trabalho vinduro. Se voce quer um relacionamento der certo, voce tem que fazer o eforto. Se voce esta procurando o "esposp perfeito" voce vai procurar sua vida enteira em vao. Nao me entenda mal, o casamento e uma coisa muita bontia. Eu estou casada e muito feliz e eu amo meu esposo com tudo que eu tenho. Mas isso nao significa que ficamos em casa o dia enteira olhando nos olhos um do outro. Nos trabalhamos duro, poupamos dinheiro (nao e divirtido mas fazemos), nos communicamos nossos necessidades um para o outro, e nos colocamos um do outro primeiro acima de todos os outros. E isso que faz o casamento feliz. E se nunca tivessemos feito isso, a gente iria terminar o nosso casamento com divorco muito tempo atras.
Nao quero aparecer chata ou brava. Mas estou tentando esplicar que o divorco nao e necessario como muitas pessoas pensem. Ha algumas situacoes em que o divorco e necessario. Especialmente quando as pessoas sofrem do abuso por exemplo. Mas o divorco e uma maneira covarde de correr dos problemas deles.
A familia e importante. E quando algo e importante nos tratamos aquilo diferentemente.
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